So.
I'm still here . . . but my computer is not.
Shall we ponder that?
Are you instantly bored by that query?
Right. Intelligent friends, you should be incredibly apathetic, even irritated, at the thought I might begin so much as a paragraph suggesting thought about my personal computer.
Let me say, instead, I would like us to ponder when the hell the Apple corporation became the insidious monolith of greed and cultural impropriety it now represents in our midst.
Did I miss that conversation?
I know, mi gente, mis comunidades, I've been a champion of All Things Apple (well, except the Stupid Shit everyone finds so necessary, meh), since the literal dawn of the company: I've owned Apple computers, from the first issuance of the Mac. In fact, I've never purchased a computer or even a peripheral from another company.
Go ahead. Be surprised. But. It's not that I'm rolling in the Big Bucks. The truth is, for long years, I was associated with universities, and the campuses where I worked paid for me to have new computer bundles, with every new fiscal cycle. So, yeah: that means I had a brand new Apple Mac computer, with all the peripherals, printer, scanner, and anything else I needed, every single year.
The one I own now is the first I've purchased on my own dime, registered directly to me, not via a university. Okay, well, it's registered under my legal name, the one under which I'm an author, tú sabes. Still.
These Apple people now wanna act like they don't know me. And I'll tell you what, mi gente, mis comunidades: after this experience—which has, without merit, flavor, or passion, devoured the better part of my last ten days—I do not wanna know Apple.
They are some rude, ineffectual techs, working for a megacorp driven by nothing but greed. In the center are a handful of midlevel PR punks, trained to "handle" whatever bad news may come their way. Which is code for endlessly repeating what Apple is "not authorized" to do, and plying the customer with undergrad Soc tricks (grad school, if you get one real clever).
Bullshit and mindfuck, people.
Which is to say: I had a deep and abiding love affair with Apple, and we are having one huge, nasty, public divorce. Pity the children . . .
On the upside, my Web Daddy can now stop teasing me about how all Mac people wear sandals (especially since I barely and only ineffectively walk, fuckyouverymuch, and I never owned a pair of Birks in my life, gah).
More good news: I have determined to go Linux. I shall have myself the most tricked-out machine evah, do you hear me? Mm.
This is the new dream of the common people: a spectacular Linux machine, personally designed by your favorite tech artiste.
You remember when a bunch of us took off in a hurry from the Microsoft corporation? There were stickers, in the best of our community stores (still are, in the best), proudly proclaiming "Microsoft Free Zone."
Apple, Inc. has become the industry leader, mi gente. It's the monolith, now. Maker of gadget fuckery, with the legal department to ensure class action suits are settled with coupons.
'K, then.
Let's take our business to the queer, unemployed, person of color we all know, who's a damned genius, and will build a computer from scrap.
Years ago, I believed I was helping the tiny Apple company get its start, toward making something good happen, and making a difference.
So, that didn't play.
Now, we don't play Apple.
Let's bring our business on home.
Spread the love.
~Emmanuela
/ rant *s
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